Something has to change

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THE most beautiful words, “But, I love you.”  The most painful words, “I love you, but.”

Change is inevitable but how we respond to change is a matter of choice. How many times I sat in despair at an unexpected misfortune. But, with the benefit of hindsight, things were never as bad as they at first appeared. In fact, time is much more than a great healer, it is a redeemer.

What if are the most haunting of words. What if we had married, what if I had not been made bankrupt, and what if my husband had got that job or had not made that decision. Only from a distance can we come to realise that the end of one world is often the beginning of a far better world.

As a 16-year old with kitbag slung over my shoulder I felt apprehensive as I crossed my first gangplank. Little did I know that I was crossing a bridge that would open a world that would enrich my life forever.

Blown this way and that way by the fickle winds of fate I often found myself in difficult situations. I felt I was continually being tested and never was I found wanting. With jaw set I learned new jobs or adapted to new circumstances in places or situations that I was totally unfamiliar with.

Neither of my children was planned but their arrival changed our world. Our immortal words were; “What now?” The answer; our lives were changed forever and for the better.

A writer by trade I genuflected each time I saw my ancient Olympia typewriter. Sure, it was irritating to fork out for new typewriter ribbons and inky fingers came with the territory. But, happiness isn´t having what you want, it is to want what you have.

I was daunted to say the least when in the 1990s my wife tried to explain the advantages of the computer. Such was my phobia against change that I must admit I was far from a patient student.

Only now do I realise that I was morphing from quill and parchment to becoming more powerful than a then city newspaper´s editor. The outcome was that my life changed for the far better. In fact, because of my newly acquired computer my good fortune would make the great writers of history drool.

In September 2008 I loaded my battered car until the chassis buckled. Putting home country and indeed my life in my rear view mirror I set out for Spain. All I had was Europe’s second lowest state pension and hope in my heart.

Has a lesson been taught?

Yes, welcome change.

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